Ripples
Hello Valkyries!
In my previous post, I mentioned that to mark Nov. 25—the International Day for Eliminating Violence Against Women and Girls—Clearwater Aikikai would open the doors of its Evening Class to the public to talk about the principles of non-violence that are at the foundation of aikido.
We did. And one person came.
Honestly, I wasn’t that surprised. At 7 pm, it’s cold and dark in Clearwater these days. And “It’s such a busy time of the year…”
But that one person who came? I suspect that her presence on the mats that night is going to open some new doors in my life. She set off some ripples.
Previously, I knew her as the mother of one of my young students. But now, because of an open invitation, I know her as a counsellor who has passionately spent more than a decade helping youth who have been exposed to abuse, threats, or violence in the home.
It turns out, she works for a program called PEACE: Prevention, Education, Advocacy, Counselling and Empowerment. This program seeks to promote attitude and behavior change in ways that will help youth who have been exposed to violence feel safe and better able to succeed socially and academically.
We are meeting, off the mats, in a few weeks to see how we can each learn from the other and to discover if there’s a role that aikido might be able to play in PEACE.
But going back to that cold, dark night with the open door, another little ripple was set in motion. One that I hope will reach you.
While introducing the class, I read out a statistic that was very difficult for me to deliver.
“One in three women have been subjected to physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence, non-partner sexual violence, or both, at least once in their life.”
It’s a horrifying statistic, made more horrible by the fact that sitting on the mats in front of me were three girls and three women.
One in three.
It felt like the kind of prophecy you really don’t want to hear. How can you prepare young girls for the reality of that statistic? How can you support the women and girls who understand the reality of that statistic too well?
In the moment that I read out that sentence, looking at their faces, I realized how important it was that the dojo be not only a place of training, but a safe place. A safe place where unspeakable statistics can be talked about.
Yesterday, one of those young girls who had been there that night told me she had talked to her teacher at school about what she had learned. And then she added, “I think he’s going to organize a school assembly.”
Ripples.
The world can seem like such a messed up place (something else we talked about that night), and it can make you feel really small and helpless (yup, talked about that too). But even little pebbles tossed in clear water make ripples. (See what I did there?)
So open a door and see if someone walks through.
Make your dojo a place where the unspeakable can be talked about.
Post information on your dojo’s message boards (both physical and virtual) about local resources where help and support for those exposed to violence can be received.
Learn: https://www.un.org/en/observances/ending-violence-against-women-day
And be someone who listens. And looks for ripples.
Even if it seems like a small thing to do, it counts.
That’s all for now, Valkyries. Happy Flying!
With love from your instigator,
Myrna